Travelling Japan With A Broken Heart

It's been a few weeks since I got back from Japan. I finally got my film developed and thought it's about time I start posting some stories and reflections about the incredible time I had on this trip.

But I want to give some context to my frame of mind first.

Just weeks before going on this trip of a lifetime that I've fawned over for so long, my mother died, suddenly.

It was the saddest day of my life, as you can imagine, and it continues to affect me deeply. It was followed with a lot of unpleasant work and uncomfortable conversations as I let various people and organizations know what had happened. Initially, I wasn't sure if I would be able to go ahead with this trip, but after dealing with the most pressing matters (I'm also executor of her estate), I learned that most of these things take time. Family and friends encouraged me not to cancel or postpone the trip, so I went ahead with it, knowing it would just be a different type of journey than I'd always envisioned.

My time in Japan was incredible! Full 10/10! It was everything I'd envisioned and more: the people were so nice and hospitable; the streets were spotless - just like they say; some places were packed with tourists, but there's always a hidden surprise, just off the beaten path; the food was amazing and surprisingly cheap; the mixture of old and new world was consistently breathtaking; I'm now deeply in love with trains; and I would go back in a heartbeat.

Because this was a solo trip, I had a lot of time to wander and ponder. I'd visit an ancient temple and think of home, or take a snapshot of the never-ending cityscape from a tower and wish I could share it with my mom.

Japan was an overwhelmingly positive experience for me. It just carried an extra sense of longing and loss along with it. I'm so glad I went and I'm so grateful to have had a mother to miss. I'm just as grateful for the family and friends I still have, who rooted for me while I took this opportunity to pause.

Thanks everyone.